So its been 2 months since mom died and yesterday was her 50th birthday. It seems that the aunt and uncle have decided that its time to stop being somewhat nice towards me and its time to start showing their true colors. Its now like I'm living in a prison and its bloody well starting to tick me off. Not only are they telling me what I can and can't buy but I'm not allowed to have TV in my room till I get a job; which means that not only am I missing my baseball, I also have to watch what they watch and I have to wait till a day after my shows air to watch it. I'm also not allowed to have a cell phone till I get a job.
I'm also pissed off how the aunt calls Tiger names and keeps on threatening that she is going to throw her out when I'm not watching. Tiger has only had me and mom to be with, now she has 3 strangers she has to get used to as well as another cat so of course she's going to growl and hiss but the aunt gets pissed off and calls her attitude and tells her that she and I is lucky to have a roof over our heads because we could have been out on the streets.
Yesterday the cousin woke me up and asked if I wanted to come out with her and the aunt so I won't have to sit home alone and think. It was all going ok till I went to HMV while the cousin looked in another store, I found a book that I wanted; it was Wolverine with the X-Men graphic novel, it was only $20 and I was about to go and buy it when they came into HMV and started in on me saying that I can buy it seeing as how I have no money and no job; something that they love reminding me about, I told them that I had some money and that the book wasn't expensive but they didn't care they kept on about me not being allowed to buy it, I got so pissed off that I threw the book and stormed off. They keep saying that once I get a job I can buy what ever I want but what they don't realize is that I probably won't find a job seeing as how I have no experience.
I just wish I can get my book picked up by a publishing house and then I won't have to worry about my lack of experience.
Then when we got home, the uncle almost started yelling at me for something that the cousin did and believe me, if she wasn't here, I would have gone off and they would have learned who the true me was. The cousin didn't recycle properly and instead of asking who it was, he automatically thought it was me and almost jumped down my throat and I was left sitting there wanting to cry, the son of a bitch didn't even say sorry to me for thinking that it was me, he just went on like nothing happen.
I swear he is too much like my grandfather and something is going to happen and I know that I'm going to snap and it won't be pretty. I guess I just need to learn to harden my heart and build that wall around myself again while trying to keep my emotions in check.
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